My dad's shoe joke

My shoes are killing me

Sneezy woman enters shoe store.

"I would like … atchoo!"

"Madam, our shoes are sold in pairs."  

Word of the day: etiolated

I remember well what this word means. It describes plants that grow in insufficient light so look blanched and have elongated stems. It was introduced in my high school Agricultural Science class. As soon as I heard it I joked: Like David!

Everybody else in the class understood what I meant and laughed. The unfortunate target of my joke was a classmate who was somewhat pale and spindly. He transferred to another school later, nothing to do with my joke, nor was he bullied. I wonder what became of him and if he remembers this moniker. I'm sure he's bulked out like all the rest of us. 🙁

Etiolated boy

The first telephone exchange

 

You can have my phone but not my cat

At university one of the lectures in final year engineering was on telecommunications, which was not formally covered by a course. It was presented by an engineer from Telecom Malaysia, the national phone company. He explained that the first automatic telephone exchange switch was invented by Strowger, an undertaker, allegedly because he suspected that the town switchboard operator was diverting calls to her husband, his business rival.

One of my classmates was very susceptible to jokes. If you told him a joke, he would start laughing and keep laughing for a minute or two. After that even a reminder of the joke would set him off again.

Anyway when I heard the phrase first telephone exchange, my mischievous mind caused me to say to him: First telephone exchange; you give me your phone, I'll give you mine. That set him off.

We got told off by the lecturer for the disruption.